Ezhnomartin, 38

I'm a twenty three year old grease-punk writer. There is a part of me that wishes I could play bluesy punk rock guitar like Mike Ness, but most of me is pretty happy exploring the written word. I write mostly about heroin addicts (most def. not one myself) homeless people, bravado, the ups and downs of living on the fringe of society, the process of artistic expression, and love.

My personality is a collection of contradictions: there is a soft spoken intellectual constantly dueling with a boisterous smart-ass juxtaposed against a damn- the-consequences rebel secretly seeking an infinite number of close friends to give the shirt off his back to, and a girl to treat like a gutter princess. Ever present is a night owl pragmatist incapeable of organization, feeling 30 with the heart of a 17 year old.

What I want: For the first time in 5 years, I have a great group of friends. It's strange for such a loner to admit that he's happier than s--- having three close friends who look alike, act alike, listen to the same music, and read the same books. I feel like I belong, and that's all anyone ever wants - I'd actually argue that us freaks want it and need it more than average people." Something is missing, though. It's all testosterone. I need someone to snuggle with, to hold hands and watch cartoons with. I need someone to absolutely adore. Yea, S-- would be nice, too, but more than that, I need someone to be exceptionally kind and affectionate towards. I love going out to the bar's with the boys, but on so many nights, I'd much rather go over to my girls house, drink tea and exchange back-rubs and dreams for the future.

Is there anyone out there who's tough, and strong, and fiercely intelligent yet romantic, and loyal, and goofy? Anyone who'll wanna wake up and watch the sunrise from under a train-bridge while drinking Brass Monkeys and smoking whole packs of cigarettes? Anyone to have sing alongs with?

I'm crossing my fingers...